Tests and Unknowns :(

A wise friend once told me, "There will always be those who have it better and those who have it worse but you still have to deal with your circumstances regardless of anyone else's.  It's ok to have hard days".
This has definitely been a hard day.
We returned around midnight from a very long day of testing.  The results were: Elina's high pressures are most likely a result of more holes and not the Pulmonary Hypertension (PH) which is good in the long run, but not so fun for now.  Both of the devices had some issues.  One is too close to a valve and causes it to leak and the other doesn't sit flush enough against the muscle to allow the cells to grow over it.  Dr. Day (the PH Specialist) doesn't quite know what to do.  He's going to talk to the surgeon and get another opinion from a doctor from a different hospital.  There's a myriad of options from another full on open heart surgery to different hybrid surgeries, etc.  Timing is also something they'll discuss.  Does it need to be sooner or later, etc.  I really really dislike the unknowns of this whole ordeal!! (if I weren't trying to teach my kids not to say HATE, I'd even use it)
And, if you're interested, here's what I also really dislike:
*watching my little girl cry after every poke, test, tape removal on her extremely sensitive skin, feeling left out, etc. etc.
*knowing every tax return, possibly for the rest of our lives, will be spent on medication
*talking to doctors, specialists, nurses, pharmacists etc. more than my family and friends
*having more bad news to share
*Even thinking about sending Elina through the entire surgery ordeal again :( :(

Even as I write this though, I am full of gratitude for so much such as:
The technology and knowledge to even do heart surgery in the first place
The wonderful medications that help the process sooo much
The fact that we even get a tax return :)
Medical Personnel who dedicate their lives to healing other people (I could never be a nurse)
My awesome Mother who was willing to come help me :)
Knowing that Heavenly Father is very aware of me and my family and that no matter what happens, we will be ok.

 We were able to spend a quick hour with my sister and her kids shooting alka seltzer rockets at the park and the other highlight of the trip was getting ice cream at the hospital after the final test was completed!